Forwards From Papa

The Colored Eggs

After the egg hunt on Easter Sunday, the young farm boy decided to play a prank.

He went to the chicken coop and replaced every single egg with a brightly colored one.

A few minutes later the rooster walked in, saw all the colored eggs, then stormed outside

and beat up the peacock......

Most Drunkenness Pics Ever

Last night Dawn had a house warming party that I am still recovering from. I've said it once and I'll say it again, whisky is the Devil's drink.



No I am not about to hurl in this picture, not yet at least.



Ben and Chris.



Dawn looking like the sex kitten she is.



Carol displaying the ice cube tray Steve defiled (right click and save as!)



I don't believe Steve is picking his nose in this picture but you never know. It was that kinda night.



This afternoon Steve reminded me that there was a point when I had forgotten my own name.



"How you doin?"





I really have to stop making captures for these pics. I really don't know what was going on.



I do know that that is Dawn's hanky panky slapper in Steve's hand and that I was hit with it soon after this picture was taken.



Ben, Carol and my foot.









Getting a breath of fresh air on Dawn's balcony.





I'm not sure when I came home last night, not too late I don't think. I did wake up at 9am still drunk and needing some water then fell back asleep until 1pm. Jamie had asked me to go to Sunday service with him this morning but I don't think he would have been too pleased had I gone with him still wasted then puked in the church. There is something very wrong about being hung over on Easter Sunday.

Your Wish is My Command...

Last night's misty sunset.

Living in Revision

I've been thinking for a while that I wanted to write about why this blog is called what it is and some of the inspiration behind it. So here goes some origins.

My first year as an undergrad at Maryland there was a tri-weekly column in the school newspaper called Living in Revision written by an older student named G. Scott Shaw. One week he wrote a column about how we rewrite ourselves and constantly look to our past to redefine/refine who we are. I wish I had it here to really express what it was about but back then I thought it one of the more beautiful and inspiring things I had read. In fact, after reading it I promptly cut it out and tacked it to my closet door. My sophomore year at Maryland I created this blog and chose the title in a sort of homage to that column and how it made me reevaluate things in my life. As for the meaning of abstract, I suggest you consult the OED.

Yesterday I Googled Living in Revision to see if anything would come up. Lo and behold, G. Scott Shaw now has a website. He doesn't have the article up but looking at his site I can't help but think that...Lord, this guy is a cheese ball.

Gnome

Today Crawford, Kiril and I went to Edinburgh to see Noam Chomsky speak at the University.



We stopped by Crawford's flat before heading to the venue and along the way we were reminded of the great affinity that some drunken fools have for Celtic. Nice one buddy.



We made it to McEwan hall just in time to queue for 20 mins



so we took pictures smiling awkwardly.



Upon entering the hall we were ushered to the pimp seats on the floor



where we had the pleasure of sitting uncomfortably for an hour while Noam extolled on the reasons we legitimise war.



After the lecture we waited in the cold for people from Crawford's department then hurried to a vegi Indian restaurant for warmth.



We ditched the old folks after dinner and hit up the Blind Poet for some pints and tequila



where and I had my camera nicked by these two characters.



After the pub we hit a vodka bar for some....um...vodka then strolled back to Crawford's flat, with some shenanigans along the way (right click and save target as!), for tea with Mum and Steph before bed.



We woke up the next morning to a newly Hulkified Crawford who made us some breakfast. After making fun of the Hogan mustache for a few more hours Kiril and I made our way back to St. Andrews, arriving just in time for dinner.

Spirito Santo

Last night I said I loved when it rained on days I need to stay in.



Instead the weather looks a lot like how I feel. Foggy and ill.



After spending all afternoon and evening reading about holy women I decided it was high time I broke out grandma's rosary and starting praying for a little divine intervention of my own.

Spirito Santo, please make me better.

A Really Good Day

Today we embarked from St. Andrews on another adventure.



First stop was the wee town of Dollar. Here's Crawford posing with a marker undoubtedly dedicated to one of his kinsmen whose first name happens to be Crawford's middle name so when he stands in front it reads Crawford William Spence, get it? So funny right?



In Dollar the town sport is collection rubbish from the stream. We witnessed about three different people competing in this thrilling game.



We went to see if we could hit up the museum but after seeing that it was closed and Castle Campbell up on the hill in the back too far to hike to we gave up and took a breather.



Pausing for some individual portraits.



Rob looking skeptical.



Crawford looking amused.


































I'm the pinecone.





Everytime I look at this picture I get Travis's "Flowers in the Window" in my head. "It's such a lovely day and I'm glad you feel the same..."





Not too shabby scenery eh?













They're right, it won't be a picnic once the G8 protesters get here.



Finally it was time to head home.



Later that evening Crawford and I met Kiril in the Cellar for a drink. Here's Crawford, looking very hot and not at all gay.

Kellie Castle

Today was another field trip if you can believe it. This time with my research methods class. We went to Kellie Castle in Pittenweem to ignore listen to the archivist regale us with tales of sort of old papers. Good new is that we got to have coffee and shortbread while he spoke



and then tour the castle for free. Above is one of my lecturers, Laura and Joseph.



This is Julian (lecturer extraordinaire) looking intently at a medieval Flemish Madonna.



I am have completely forgotten who painted the pre-Raphaelite painting above the fireplace but that is Molly looking at the Dutch tiles.



Hey dad, that couch was designed by Hugh Lorimer.



View down the center of the oh so pretty room. The castle has the a medieval structure but most of what remains was built in the 19th century.



My class gathered outside the castle thanking archive guy for the tour.



After seeing the inside of the castle we took a wee stroll around the gardens.



And sneaked a peek in Hugh Lorimer's studio.



The gardens were nice. Small, but nice. Quaint maybe.



Mark and Joseph strolling.



See ya Kellie Castle, it was real.

So Damned Cute

Tonight we said goodbye to Nenya in advance with a little champagne after dinner in Steve's flat.



Dawn tried to see how much cheese a wafer really could hold



and Jamie and Crawford listened intently while Steve told a story.



When story time was done we all posed for a group shot.



All this hotness and the best wardenial team in St. Andrews.



After the champagne Crawford and I went down to The Cellar to meet up with Rob, Kiril and a bunch of other people. It was folk music night (or something) there and the group in the corner are all jamming a little celtic goodness.



This picture was in no way posed. We are always this adorable.

Quick Question

What is up with the British putting an eee sound at the end of every other word?
Here are a few examples:

• Footie
• Toastie
• Baddie
• Goodie
• Tele
• Bogie
• Sweetie
• Chippie
• Woolie

And that is just what I thought of on the walk home. Feel free to let me know of any others that might have slipped my mind or possible explainations.

Oh Lord

I couldn't manage much today after last night's shenanegans. I chatted on the phone to my mom, Sea and Deb, crawled to Tesco for some food and watched Half-Baked with Crawf.



Melville at Dusk:

Forwards From Papa

I received this one from Papa today and it seems eerily appropriate seeing the evening I had last night.

Timing is key:

Jack wakes up at home with a huge hangover he can't believe. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose!

Jack sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Jack looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror, and notices a note on the table: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping--Love you!"

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks,"Son...what happened last night?"

"Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.""So, why is everything in such perfect order, so clean, I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"

His son replies, "Oh THAT!... Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, "Leave me alone, lady, I'm married!"

Broken furniture - $85.26
Hot Breakfast - $4.20
Red Rose bud -$3.00
Two Aspirins -$.38

Saying the right thing, at the right time.........Priceless.

"Something grabs a hold of me tightly"

FIELD TRIP! Today I visited the Royal Yacht Britannia with my fellow Shippers. My three classmates and I piled into my lecturer's tiny Fiat at 11am and we were off, headed for Edinburgh. Do you remember going on field trips at school? Amazing. No class and gift shops. What could be better then buying space ice cream at the science museum while your little sister is sitting in school like a sucka?



The yacht is parked in the harbour at Leith. It used to sail around the world once a year, Queen in tow, but it was decommisioned about a decade ago and is now trampled about mainly by pensioners with nothing else better to do on a weekday.



Jeremy (Dr. Howard) paying for us all with the department credit card, which he later used to buy us all lunch. Nice one.



The yacht is actually pretty impressive. Can't see why the Queen ever gave it up.



Laura and Kiril pretending to read the information in front of Jeremy... oh wait, that was me.



There was a self guided tour with one of those handheld gadgets. I used it for about two decks then gave up after I fell asleep on my feet and fell overboard.



"ummm...please don't play with the big ass light, I have to use that to signal 'you suck' to Belgium every night."





Jeremy and Kiril on deck.



I have no idea what that is.



The dining hall. Apparently available for hire. It's got a great view of the mall on the right bank and a factory across the harbour.





The engine room. So immaculate that Norman Schwarzkopf thought it must have been just for show when he first saw it and demanded to see the real one. That is because Americans are dirty and the British English are oh so clean.



Laura, Jeremy and Kiril chillin in the officers lounge.



You see? I'm right there in the glass.



After the tour was done Kiril and I stayed in Edinburgh and hit a few shops and the National Gallery where we saw Raphael's Madonna of the Pinks.



We stopped for some food after we were kicked out of the gallery and headed back home.



Crawford, Sean and Rob.

Two hours after we arrived home Crawford and I headed over to Kiril's for a "Texas Party." Apparently giving permission to girls who should know better to tie their shirts up around their naval and wear tank tops in the winter.



"Crawford, what happened to the love we once shared?" sorry.



Lord knows what we were even talking about at this point. FYI: Red wine and vodka are not a good idea.



Kiril and I.



Crawford, Rob and Alan. I don't recall taking this picture but it looks to me like shots are being done. I think after this is when Rob tossed a glass of water on me, then Crawford got in on the action and somehow I ended up being held by my arms and legs while they tried to put me in the recovery position.



Me at 4am, wet from having water thrown on me and sweaty from dancing, taking a breather outside.



Me and my guys about to head out the door at 5am. My head looks like it has been cut and pasted in there.

Around the World in Eighty Clicks

Midnight
Originally uploaded by Kellas.

My current obsession are blogs by people travelling around the world. I can feel that familiar itch that tells me to pick up and go with each entry I read. This is not too recent a development though. As some of you might remember, before I left for Scotland I wanted my next big trip to be a drive from the Mexican border all the way down to Cape Horn. Hence why I seriously thought about asking for a gun for my birthday, you know, for the glove compartment.

You might say, 'But Jen, you already live a million miles from home.' Well true that friend but the propensity to wander does not diminish the further away from home you get it just makes the next step easier. Now all I need is a little cash and I'll be free as a bird.

Go here to read about Kim's friend Amy on her adventures (I apologize for the title and lack of capitalization)and here to read the amazingly beautiful and funny blog by a guy named Brook. Their paths crossed while they were in Australia, it's a small world after all. Also here is the link for The Long Way Around, if two actors on a motorbike could do it I don't see why I couldn't.

Maps, Soundgarden and House Hunting

Today during breakfast Crawford suggested we take a walk somewhere since he had his parent's car for the weekend. Who am I to refuse a drive in the country even though I did have a slight trepidation that the very fit Crawford would force me to do some hiking.



He suggested we go to Falkland, a beautiful town where the Stewarts came to holiday. The above is the entrance to their palace.



It sort of reminded me of Bruges. I was very impressed at the efforts made to preserve the town's original structures.



The view from the hill. We didn't go too far up (thank god). It was pretty icy and I think Crawford could see that I wasn't too good at this exercise thing.



We made it back before lunch due to my impressive map skills (worse then useless my ass, ha!). I was on duty from 2pm and spent the majority of my time not doing work, heaven forbid, but chatting with Steve and his lovely friend and watching episodes of The Family Guy. In the evening I borrowed Jamie's copies of Star Trek Nemesis (I am a trekkie, come and get me) and Superman 2. Both of which were surprisingly enjoyable even though the movies proceeding these sequels were utter rubbish.

You know what's funny is that when I spell check blogger wants to replace Soundgarden with Snodgrass. What the fuck is snodgrass?

Forwards From Papa

A Pond Story

An elderly man in Florida had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back, fixed up nice -- picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some orange and grapefruit trees. The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming when it was built.

One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, to look it over. He grabbed a five gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end. One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!"

The old man frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the pond naked." Holding the bucket up he said, "I'm here to feed the alligator."

Moral: Old men can still think fast.

Environmental Disaster

This week St. Andrews has been consumed with election fever. It's been slightly insane but all in all I haven't been too effected by it. I did go to the library today and cast my vote and it might just have been for the guy bellow.



Getting into the library was a bit of an ordeal. People where shoving bits of coloured paper into my hand and wanted me to walk through silly archways. Madness. And such a waste of paper. Won't someone remember the trees?!



The actual vote itself was a bit archaic with little bits of coloured paper, again, on which I had to number candidates 1-whatever in order of choice. I recall at UMD getting caught up in election fever as well. There candidates formed parties and went around wearing matching shirts. One year one of the parties got the brilliant idea to rent golf carts and drive around campus shouting at people with a bullhorn. I only clearly remember voting once back then, and that was because the guy I liked was running.

Pardon Me?

Sinner
Originally uploaded by Kellas.

Before class today I went to the library to gather some books on covents in Italy when I came across this book on Mother Teresa. Someone has got to be taking the piss with this title. It's sacralicious but dude, even atheists have got to have some respect.

Oh and class was fine, yada yada. Learned that I should be respectful to archivist even though they are probably cloistered freaks and that under no circumstances should I bring a pen anywhere near them lest I feel the need to be humiliated in front of a bunch of other researchers. All of which wasn't too surprising. What was mildly surprising was the reappearance of a girl that we all thought left for good last semester seeing as she went home to America without, apparently, handing in any assignments. How she had the coglione to come back and face our teachers is beyond me. And after class my day was made just a little bit brighter by going out for a coffee with Joseph and Mark.

"This is an adventure"

Insomnia
Originally uploaded by Kellas.

Today was another completely lazy day. I did some reading but mostly I updated this bloody blog and wrote emails. I was surprised to see that it had snowed in the night so much but that mostly just excused me from having to leave my room.

This evening Rob picked Crawford and I up from Melville and we went to Dundee to see The Life Aquatic. I thought it was brilliant. Really funny and beautiful. I love Wes Anderson's use of colour. Were not the blue uniforms and red caps like a whole other character? The fish of course were amazing looking as well. I think my favourite thing about Wes Anderson films though, besides Bill Murray, is the way the dialogue flows. It is so easy and effortless that I always come away longing to have the ability to be as quipy and honest.

It's off now to attempt some sleep. Can't believe it is nearly one already...