Things People Never Want to Hear but Always Want to Say

1. I'm hungry
2. I'm tired
3. I don't feel well

Eat something or go home. That's my advice because really, there's nothing I can do when you tell me these things. Not that people are often whinging to me about their tummy hurting, but it's just a pet peeve I have. If I ever feel these words about to fly out of my mouth, I pinch myself.

Franz Ferdinand and Everybody I Know at Bowery

June 14th, everyone I know piled into Bowery Ballroom to see watch Franz Ferdinand try out their new material. It was like I threw a party and all my friends came and my favourite band showed up to play. Jill gave me my ticket as a present, which was amazing.

I did not get to see Adrian Grenier unfortunately. Such a shame. Lord he is amazing.

I did see this guy. My mate Chris of MusicSnobbery.com hamming it up for the camera.

And here are Grant, Jill and I. I really like this picture. Thanks PrefixMag.

I Am Huge in Brasil

Sunday night, I was interviewed by a Brasilian online magazine about the After the Jump Fest and The Music Slut. The writer Flavia sent me the link yesterday and I was shocked to see she used a picture from my MySpace as the header. At least it was a kinda cute one. I took that on the lawn of the Art History building in St. Andrews while I was writing my dissertation.

You can read the article in Portuguese here, or the translation below.

1) How did the idea for it came up?
I came up with the idea for the festival last summer. I wanted to hold
a big concert around Christmas time with other music bloggers to
support the non-profit, Toys For Tots. A lot of people were
interested, but the idea sort of fizzled when I couldn't find an
indoor venue. This past spring however another blogger, Pat from
PopTartsSuckToasted.blogspot.com, told me that he wanted to throw a
blogger curated festival as well and my passion for the project was
ignited again.
The name was the brainchild of David Caplan of BumperShine.com.

2) How many bands are schedules? Can you say some names? Only indie
acts or will some be more mainstream?
There will most likely be 15 acts total. 6 on the main day stage, 4
for the night show and between 5 and 6 for the outdoor side stage.
Plus half a dozen djs throughout the entire event. We are not
releasing band names yet, but were are really excited about the groups
so far whom have agreed to come aboard to support our initiative to
raise money for underfunded music programs in New York City. They are
all bands whom we have blogged about in the past and/or whom we feel
could be the next big name in music. They represent genres from
alternative country to new rave, from the big names in indie music to
the small band from Brooklyn just starting out.

3) How did you chose the consultant bloggers?
The blogging community in New York is rather small, eventually you get
to know everybody. I asked every blogger I knew who blogs on a regular
basis. It helps that most bloggers are of the same mentality and are
generally easy to get along with.

4) Will there be any benefit aspect to it? I saw a
charity@afterthejump email...
The festival is completely for charity, that is the reason why it was
started. Because there are so many different people involved in the
planning of this event, we decided to choose a charity that would be
meaningful to all of us, giving money to underprivileged schools in
New York. We decided to start an initiative through DonorsChoose.org
and their Bloggers Choose program. We hope to raise $10,000 to give to
a variety programs, from buying turntables for a school in the Bronx
to an Organ in Harlem.

About Music Slut:

1) Some record labels have already included blog in their PR mailing
lists. do you think that's a good thing, given they may be finally
acknowledging the power of blogs or that it takes away their
spontaneity? I mention this because artists whose mp3 have been sent
by labels soon come up at Hype Machine and Elbo's charts.
I think record labels acknowledging the power of blogs is a natural
progression. More and more people are looking to blogs because they
can read now about the next hot band without waiting for the next
music magazine to get delivered.
I don't think labels sending press materials to blogs takes away from
the spontaneity of blogging, much to the chagrin of the record
labels. At the end of the day, blogs are written by people with a
passion for music, we don't pull a pay check and we don't owe anything
to a label, no matter how many guest lists they put us on or cds they
send us.

2) Do you feel responsible for which bands' recent success?
It is hard to judge whether we are responsible for a single band's
success. I will say that we were particularly pleased when The Gaskets
were invited to SXSW this past summer after we had been pushing them
for months and they were denied entry to CMJ in the fall of 2006.

3) Which Brazilian bands do you know, besides CSS and Bonde do Role?
Do you believe is there more room for another 'exotic' act from south
America?
I have been a big fan of Edu K for a while, but I must admit, I don't
know as much Brazilian music as I should. There is definitely enough
room for acts from all over the world. I have found that now people
seem to be embracing all types of music, in all sorts of languages
because they are craving something new and different. We routinely
speak to bloggers in differently countries, from Europe to Central
America.

4) Do you get many emails from Brazilian readers?
We don't get many, though we have on occasion. Luckily now, we have a
Portuguese fan who will translate for us!

5) Is the Music Slut staff living off of site revenue?
We wish! We do not make enough to support us quite yet but we blog for
the love, not the cash.

6) Do you get many invitations to parties and concerts? which are the
best nights these days?
We do get a lot of invitations to see bands and attend parties. The
best night to go out is rapidly becoming Thursday night, with so many
club kids and hipsters making their own hours these days. But Friday
night in New York City has always been the staple night.

7) What does it take to do a good music blog?
Perseverance and being unafraid to brave some really obnoxious
comments. Updating a lot and throwing your readers some quality
downloads doesn't hurt either.

A Day in the Park

Somebody recently told me that Central Park is for tourists. Totally not true. Central Park is for the awesome.




This last picture cracks me up. We were each trying to do our best glamour shot pose.

Time really flies. These pictures are from back in April, April 24th to be exact. After this, we all piled into my car, a Saturn which barely seats 4, and drove down to Murray Hill to hit a bar. It was the most hilarious car ride ever. It is funny, because even though taking the subway would have been much more comfortable the lure of a car is just too enticing to a city dweller to pass up.

I Won't Surrender

Watching Clare Danes on David Letterman. She looks like a praying mantis. Bones sticking out of your chest, not so sexy. Also, since when is she dating Hugh Dancy? He's so dreamy. I had a mild love affair with his Burberry billboard at the mall in Skopje.

Had our After the Jump meeting today. It lasted two hours and I came away incredibly exhausted. So many people were there, including a ton who usually are unable to make it. I was so impressed. We made some great progress. We decided on the line-up for the night show and came to a good compromise about the day show- which I think is going to be incredible. In fact, the whole thing is going to be awesome. Let's just hope enough people think so as well and buy a ticket.

Went out last night with Kramer and her friend Kristy. I met them out at Cube 63, a sushi place on Clinton where it is BYOB. I was in the need of a little friend TLC, and the bottle of saki didn't hurt either. The meal ended up costing me an absurd amount of cash but the sushi was pretty incredible. After polishing off the saki and the last of the tuna, we headed to a bar across the street to where Kristy's current boyfriend was djing. We sat in the back garden and popped my bottle of champagne. Brook and Jill soon joined us for the free Argentine beers we were enjoying and I kvetched to my coffee clutch of friends about the week I was having. It had only been a few days since I've seen them, but it had felt like forever. I love how that happens.

Weekend in the Country

On the 15th, Brook assembled a crew of friends and we all drove up to his parents cabin in New Hampshire for the weekend. Being the jobless git I am, I drove the early car up Friday morning with Kramer, Brook and Akshay in tow.

Brook had just come back from filming a fight in Rochester and had been up for 24 hours, while Akshay had been out late the night before. Kramer and I couldn't help but snap this picture of the two college friends passed out.

The drive up was fun. We kept the ipod off and talked for most of the way. We made the obligatory stop in Brattleboro in Vermont (it's the South of the Border of the north) for gas and inadvertently, stopped at the same exact station as the last trip where we messed around in the country store attached once more. Brook bought an ice cream... again.

Quote of the trip: "Has anybody ever driven south?" "No, I only drive north and then loop around." In reference to the incredible lure of South of the Border.

Before I left for the trip, I was running around my house trying to find a mitt. My family was so confused by this. What was I going to do with it, they wondered. Play catch or something? Well, yes. This was very funny for my dad and brother. Luckily, people brought extra gloves. The above is Kramer, Akshay and Brook playing. Brook is like a freaking jumping bean, constantly leaping in the air for balls.

As lovely as it is during the day time, the night is so fun. We just drink and play board games then pass out is comfy big beds. My car arrived to the cabin about 5 hours ahead of the car bringing working stiffs, Jill, Bill and Josie. We stopped for food and booze on the way and I made my great-grandfather's red sauce for dinner over pasta.

The grass was rather high in the field, so the next day Brook and Jill plowed a playing field for us. I sat with a beer on the porch and watched.

Jill's bouquet of mini wild flowers for me.

Chilling on the porch, Akshay trying to tune in the subway series game.

Jill doing her prom pose with the mower for the camera.

Brook plowing for home.

In the evening Saturday, we played 500. I had never heard of it before. The basic run down is that one person hits a ball to the people in the field after calling out a number. The people to catch enough balls to add up to 500 wins and hits next. Brook, being the fittest of the lot, ended up running a few people over and hitting quite a few balls. I never got past 50 points myself. I'm a bit rubbish at sport.

Earlier, we were playing ultimate frisbee and Bill knocked into me throwing me sideways with a thud. Bill is over 6 feet tall and not a small guy in the least. At that moment, I knew exactly what it was like to play American football. We all were so sweaty after the game, we went straight into the river afterward. The river that runs next to Brook's cabin is crystal clear, cool mountain water. It's beautiful and refreshing. Later in the afternoon, while people were snoozing and sunbathing, I went down there with a bottle of shampoo, stripped off into my suit and washed my hair in the water.

Saturday night after dinner, we stoked a fire outside and made smores. There were millions of fireflies out. We watched them dance around the fields as Jill and Kramer looked on in amazement. Apparently, there are no fireflies on the west coast.


Sunday, we had one chore from Brook's dad. Move the old composting toilet from the back of the house to the shed. It was a disgustingly messy job and therefore the perfect opportunity for pictures.

Bill, Josie and Akshay left for New York in the afternoon after a quick game of Taboo. The rest of us sat around and drank the dregs of the box wine before heading back in the early evening. Kramer acted as the designated driver and drove us all home. A job I would not want to trade her for. Brook and I somehow thought it would be a good idea to fill water bottles up with vodka and redbull and drink that all the way back down. Brook for some reason wouldn't stop hitting Kramer's chair and the two of us forced the others to listen to us "sing" Rent way too loud and way too off key for way too long. A major blow to my ego came when Kramer said, "Well maybe if you sang it and didn't scream it, it wouldn't be so bad."

About a half an hour outside the city, Brook lost it. Thank goodness for that half empty bag of tortilla chips, or else I would have been hosing out my car the next day. Instead of going home that night, I crashed at Kramer's in Harlem. I woke up to her roommate's German Shepard puppy gnawing at my arm and didn't know whether I wanted to go back to sleep, puke or eat something. I decided just to leave. That ride home was one of the longest of my life. Thank god for Kramer.

La Vie En Rose

I woke up this morning to 'La Vie En Rose' wafting loudly into my bedroom. It is not the worst thing to wake up to and at least it got me out of bed before 11am.

My mom and her shiatsu person, Rosalie are in the living room, directly in the path of the bathroom so I must stand there and talk with them for a few minutes without my teeth being brushed. Every Tuesday, my mom has shiatsu, an Eastern massage technique (no, not like that dirty). When I was much younger, Rosalie would come to the house for my mom as well. She had wild black hair and I thought she was a little bit scary. Now-a-days, she is just an old hippy whom likes to talk to me about music and film. It's nice and I love talking to her, even though I usually am in my robe with my hair all tousled in a bun when I do.

I don't know if the shiatsu actually helps my mom with her M.S., but she does like the company Rosalie provides and when you are unable to go out on your own, that is worth the cost of the hour.

I have never mentioned it before on this site, but my mom does have M.S. I don't really know what else to say about it. She has had it since I was 2, but probably really since she was in her late teens, and for a lot of my life, it has been alright, not great, but relatively stable. These days, not so much. That is partly the reason I moved back home.

People are often sick in my house, a fact of my life that is draining to both body and soul especially seeing as I am usually always well (knock on wood). You might never guess that seeing as I am usually quick to laugh and am generally a happy and optimistic person. Two weeks ago I was on my way into the city to see La Boheme when I was waylaid at Long Island Jewish Medical Center, my sister had been admitted to see an EMT. I was so angry, I couldn't help it. It seemed so unfair that I had to be at the hospital yet again. I wanted to drag my sister out of there, throw her in the car and tell her that she'll be fine and go home. I don't know how often other people visit hospitals, by my quota seems awfully high. That horrible hospital smell of plastic, sickness and hospital food is enough to make me wretch with too many bad memories.

My sister is plagued with a series of odd medical ailments, all of which have no connection to each other and are usually paired with a fair amount of pain and discomfort (ears being drained, calcium deposits, severe tonsillitis, etc). She was born with dark circles under her eyes and as a very little girl she would often get a virus my aunt and uncle dubbed typhoid Kristin as it would wipe out my entire family for days. Maybe all that was a portent.


This week's family death watch is my dog Max, a particularly hard blow to my mom whose emotions are already fragile and now can't seem to stop crying. The little guy was diagnosed with cancer Friday and since we found out, seems to be on a downward spiral, though looking at him now, he seems to be doing alright. It will be a matter of weeks apparently. He's relatively young, especially for a lhasa apso and is my mom's special little teddy bear. It is going to be hardest on her.

A Short History of What the Hell I am Doing

It occurs to me that things I mention on here might not make any sense to those not living in my head. Sorry. So in order to help you out, I have created this crib sheet. If it doesn't help, well then maybe you should just stop reading this site because honestly, there is no hope for you. Pack it in now while you still have some dignity left.

Time-line

In November of 2005, right before Thanksgiving, I moved back to New York from St. Andrew's Scotland. I was suppose to complete a Ph.D. at the university there but couldn't really think of a topic I was passionate about and didn't want to work with the art history staff there any longer after Dr. Cassidy, my secondary thesis advisor, said to me something I will never forget, “Why do you want a Ph.D. anyway? Just to be called doctor? Go home, have a family.” I told my darling friend, warden and St. Andrews student support services employee about the incident,whom wanted to drag Cassidy in for sensitivity training. I declined the offer.

From 2006 to 2007 I have basically been freelancing, trying to freelance, working temp jobs, working on my site, The Music Slut, and throwing shows for my site, The Music Slut. For six months I worked a temp job at Estee Lauder in their Loss Prevention department where I learned all about security and catching criminals and last month I worked for Grand Central Publishing doing publicity where I learned all about being annoying.

And now, I am just working on making my blog festival, After the Jump, a reality and trying to figure out how to blog for a living.

The New Cast

After I came back to New York, friends seemed to be thin on the ground and I was pretty depressed. I went from a place where I felt nothing but love to a home where I felt nothing but lonely. I think this was a combination of two things. One, that I no longer had anything in common with my few friends leftover from my school days and two, that I no longer wanted to. That answer goes for all but three people I went to Syosset High School with.

In August of 2005, I invited a backpacker to stay with me in St. Andrews. We spent a day as friends and a night as lovers before he left for Paris and me Istanbul. His name was Brook and he was a friend of a friend of a friend. He ended his journey back in New York a month after I did and we met up once more at his coming home party in the Shades of Green Tavern near Gramercy Park. Since then, I've worked my way into his group of friends and ex-lovers (I always joke that we must have the same taste in women) who all seem to congregate around him.

I am thankful to Amy, that friend of ex-schoolhood chum Kim, for writing her atrocious blog about travelling around the world where in one entry she decided to include a sentence about a boy she met in an airport in New Zealand. Because of that one choice in narrative, I've met a whole cast of characters who have made both my sides ache with laughter and my liver scream in pain. But alcoholism be damned, I am having a hell of a good time.

The people who belong to this movement are (and yes, I realise most have a connection with Brook but remember, I was the one to infiltrate the group through him):

Kramer
Brook met Kramer in Times Square at the edge of 2004. They went home together after half an hour. Kramer was visiting from Colorado, where she was finishing up a BA. Soon after graduation though, she moved to NYC to pursue film and her and Brook, now friends, tackled Brook's charge of slamming one down at 400 bars in '04. Kramer works on movies as a pa but is working her way up to assistant director. She gets to meet movie stars and work a few days per month. She is brave and kind and chasing her dream, which astounds me on a daily basis.

Akshay
Brook's freshman roommate has yet been able to shake him. I love hearing stories about their NYU days together. There is a particularly funny tale about a crackhead roommate who dropped acid into his eye. Akshay pushes money around in a big shiny office building in midtown and knows a little about everything and a lot about many things. It is best not to argue with him, you'll only loose. And when he gets drunk around a foreigner, he'll drop into an Indian British Empire era accent that is kinda sexy.

Jill
Jill and Kramer have been friends since their Catholic school days in Napa, California. After college, Jill moved to DC where she worked on The Hill. She soon realised that American politics is all bullshit and ran off to Eastern Europe for three months before moving to NYC where she works in a much more worthwhile business, PR for pharmaceuticals companies. Jill's my concert buddy and I am currently listed in her phone as Jen Music. She is one of the funniest people I know in real life and will routinely make liquid come out my nose, mouth and various other orifices.

Erin
Erin was pursued by a friend to help design the graphics for a movie by an indie filmmaker he knew. That filmmaker was Brook and the movie was his A Map For Saturday, the film he made while travelling around the world in 2005. Their relationship is a volatile one. When two people as strong willed, intelligent and creative as they are get together, there can only be great fights and great love. It is probably a good thing they are not dating, it might end in murder. Erin is one of those rare people whom the term “they would give you the shirt off their back” actually applies.

Jason M.
A friend of Akshay's from work. He too makes a shit-load of money and works in banking or some such thing. He has a lovely girlfriend from Sweden named Caterina. They both just moved to Boston where Cat is getting her masters at MIT and Jason is looking for a new job. Their loft in SoHo was incredible and before they left, they threw a “Drink all our Booze” party to get rid of all the extra alcohol. I once slept of Jason's floor in the summer but was so cold because of his air conditioning, I could hardly sleep. I stopped by for New Years and was already so drunk, I puked in his bathroom.

Demetri
Sort of an alternate on the scene, Demetri is another friend from Brook and Akshay's NYU days. He is very funny and when we first met called me gorgeous, so of course I like him. He's a doctor and if you ever meet him, ask him to tell you some of his intern stories. Oh the hilarity. It's like Scrubs but scarier. He just broke up with his fiance, whom nobody really liked anyway, so hopefully we'll be seeing more of him.

Dave
Kramer's friend from when she first moved to Harlem from Colorado. He lived in the apartment across the hall and apparently, those were some wilds times. When I first met Dave, he was wearing a dress. It was Halloween. Despite the horrendous wig and slinky red number, I liked him. A couple weeks later, we met again out and I liked him even more. He was smart and carried a violin. He had a dry sense of humour and though he was a little cocky, it's a trait I've always had a weakness for. He came away with Erin, Jill and I to Brook's cabin in the winter and I think I came on a bit strong. I feel a bit stupid about that but too late now. I haven't hung out with him in quite a while and only ever by chance since then.

New Friends Through Music and Shows

Rad
Matt and I met Rad through our site when he offered Matt a bootleg of a Sigur Ros concert. From then on, he has been a good friend. He gives the tightest hugs, watched some of the World Cup with me last summer, came to my birthday party armed with bowling shoes and is dating a lovely girl whom I quite approve of.

Chris
A fellow concert-goer I met through school-mate Laura at a show in November of 2005. He doesn't know this, but I had my membership in the V club revoked because of him. I didn't want to scare him so I lied when he asked. He makes superb, yet greasy, mac n' cheese and despite him acting rather cold and odd around me these days, I still hold a soft spot for him.

Ben
I met Ben at that same concert where I first met Chris. A few months later, I was alone at a show and spotted him in the crowd so I went over and reintroduced myself. He got my phone number and we started hanging out quite a bit. I really thought he fancied me but as much as I would like to have... well he was in the army let's just say, it never happened. It all came crashing down when he found out I was a socialist and he confessed to being a libertarian. He is an awesome friend though, despite his misguided politics. Just not the one for me.

Grant
When I was a freshman in high school, I had a sleepy lab partner. He would snore in class, snooze on my shoulder and nod off during experiments. He was into rock music and played the drums; I thought there could be nobody cooler. For four years of high school, I harboured a bit of a crush to be honest.
Fast forward eight years later to a concert at Mercury Lounge in Manhattan. There is a guy a few people over, right up against the stage like myself. He looks so damned familiar that I am on the cusp of asking my friends if he is someone famous when it hits me, it's Grant. Grant from high school. I go up to him after the band is done. “I'm sorry, this might sound weird, but is your name Grant?” It's him and he is with another person from high school, his best friend Dom who is a year older than us. Dom actually knows my site and Grant takes my phone number before they both leave. There is nobody I quite look forward to seeing as much as him. He is a comedy writer, I love to laugh, he makes music and I love to listen.

Dominik (Dom)
Grant's best friend since he was a wee lad. Dom is looking for love in all the wrong places... like the NY Sports Club in Chelsea. He is absurdly funny and insists he is gross, though there is nothing gross about smelling like weed. We both go to too many shows, but at least I don't have to pay for mine. He has a sweet, loving heart and I feel glad to have gotten to know him so many years after sitting in Shakespeare class with him in 1998.

Pat and Rachael
I officially met Pat and Rachael at the launch party for Baeble Music where Ra Ra Riot and Mixel Pixel performed, but I knew them before that through their websites. They are a power blogging couple, one of the rare few. Pat writes Pop Tarts Suck Toasted and Rachael is now the blogger for CMJ but for years has had her own blog, Underrated Magazine. We end up at a lot of the same shows and I am always so glad to see them. Even though Pat can act like an asshole, he has a heart of gold and I genuinely rather go see a show with him more than any other blogger. Rachael is a saint to put up with Pat, but besides that, is a beacon of light at every show she goes to. I don't know anybody with a love of music more pure.

Blogmates

All of these people have similar, if not identical tales of how I met them, though they are all individually awesome.

Wes- Wes writes ProductShopNYC with Jason.

Wesley- Owns the music label Family Records and plays guitar in the band The Undisputed Heavyweights. I met him at Nora's birthday party at The Skinny where he tried to convince me he was Dutch.

D.- Listed me for a show she curated for her partnership with friend Jeff called Neon Lights. She evidently came down to the show looking for Matt and I but mistook someone else for me and told a stranger "hey SLUT."

Bryan- I first chatted with Bryan online when I told him he was wrong about disliking Editors. He is a friend of Laura's and is truly a renaissance man, able to draw, make music and create computer programs. He is in the band Man in Gray, whom Matt and I had play our Christmas show and has a knack for making me feel it will all be alright.

Ryan- I met Ryan at a Wakey!Wakey! in studio a few months ago, after which we had our first After the Jump Fest meeting. He is so nice and adorable I just want to squeeze him. He evidently throws these awesome fuck-off parties that one day I vow to go to.

Abbey- The head of After the Jump's booking committee, Abbey seemingly knows everybody in the music biz and is joy to be around. She takes pictures of concerts, musicians and all manner of other cool things. She has this exotic past life full of boarding schools and European adventures that I wish I knew more about and she is just as much a geek about art as I am.

Cameron- A good friend of Abbeys, Cameron works for Mute Records and is trying to get his rather awesome magazinse, 'Sup, off the ground. He is hilarious, campy and sweetly bitchy.

Dave- A legend in his own right, Dave writes the biggest music blog in New York and one of the biggest hands down. Thankfully, he's also a hell of a nice guy.

Jerry- For Brook's birthday last year, I won him tickets to see Arctic Monkeys through the site VillageIndian, run by the elusive Amrit. Amrit is good friends with Jerry and we all ended up going to the show together. Jerry is an architect, a damned good karaoke singer and loves to organise flag football matches.

Jeff- Another meet through Laura and the blogger karaoke crew I sometimes go out with. Laura and him singing Fall Out Boy together is one of the more awesome things I have experienced.

Jason- Matt and I recently were invited onto Jason's Sirius radio show, so that should already tell you he is a good guy. He has been friends with Laura for quite a while and is heading up the Publicity committee. He is getting married soon and the theme is masquerade, how cool is that?

Nora- Nora is best friends with Rachael and djs around the Lower East Side, usually at a place called The Skinny.

TMS Anniversary Blackmail Pictures

Some of my favourite photos below from the night with more over on my Picasa album.

It was a completely ridiculous evening. It started off at Matt's flat in Brooklyn where my friends and his friends converged to stuff goodie bags for the night and sing a little happy birthday to him. We gorged on cannoli cake, packed my car with the bags and then hit the road for Manhattan and The Delancey.

Sea and Shira came up for the event. There's Shira busting out Sea's gangsta name, 2Pak.


Sea, Happy and Shira chillin with some pizza before the show.


Greg and Honne Wells opening the show with their not so secret set premiering Greg's solo material.


Next up were my dear friends The Lisps. They sang a special song about sluts for us and Matt's birthday. Aww.




For our third act, The Gaskets, we hit a bit of a snafu. Less than an hour before the boys were set to hit the stage, Teddy comes up to me and says that Ross is missing and that they haven't spoken in two days. Holy shit. What the freak am I suppose to do? Jason suggests that we just play the album and have Teddy get up there and sing with all those who know their songs as his back-up singers. After some coaxing, Teddy and manager Igor were convinced, we picked 5 Gaskets songs and their cover of 'Got my mind set on you' and we were off- jumping around the stage, dancing and singing all the lyrics. It was awesome and sweaty and one of the more fun things I've done in my life.








Baeble Music was there to film the whole show and Going.com sent a photographer. Throughout the night, Matt and I interviewed the bands for the camera. Funny thing is, after Baeble went through all the trouble of filming us, they wanted to send the footage to Matt and I to edit. Um, how the hell are we suppose to do that? Hopefully at some point though, we'll have something youtubable to post.

It was a really fun night. There was a little disagreement though with The Delancey that has thrown into question whether we will throw another show there, but overall a good night. The place wasn't nearly as packed as our last few shows, which was surprising as it was all free and 1100 people rsvped. I suppose the fact that it was free sort of dissuaded people. Maybe they thought that since it was free, it wasn't that important to go. Who knows. All I really cared about was that they audience was full of my friends having a good time.

A Heart so Deep, I Drown in It

toothpastefordinner.com
Had After the Jump Fest meeting tonight at Pianos. The guy tormenting me last week was there.

I've come home just now on the train from New York feeling incredibly sad about tonight, about the situation. In my head, I had a whole little speech I wanted to say tonight to him about how this whole thing has to stop. How it is not fair to me when I don't have a boyfriend and that I regret it ever happening because I honestly would love to be friends and to loose that possibility makes me mad and regretful.

Instead, my voice shook every time I spoke to him and a small smile crept over my face every time I looked at him. I chickened out when saying goodbye and left fighting the urge to turn back with the hopes of sitting near him for a while. Why can I speak to 10,000 people on the radio and 300 people at a venue and be so nervous around one person? Why does it have to be this way? And when did this site turn into a live journal?

Work was irritating today. Training the guy who is replacing me really isn't so bad, I just wish that he would retain things I say and write stuff down. It's not my job anymore to take notes when the boss gives instructions, it is my job to tell you how to do it.

Had interview for editorial assistant position. Went well I think though I was disheartened to see that the editor interviewing me looked barely older than myself. Maybe she just has good skin. Thursday is the big interview with the editorial director. Apparently, I will be getting a homework assignment. Sort of nervous about having the time to complete it. In the back of my mind I can't help but thinking, "If I get this job, that means I can't go away."

The Music Slut's Terrible Twos

I can't believe it has already been 2 years since Jamie first bounded up to me outside my house on Lamond Drive saying he had a great idea about starting a music blog called The Music Slut.



This Saturday is our big anniversary show. The concert is free if you rsvp to going.com/musicslutanniversary, which is awesome. Erin made this beautiful poster for us, I love it. I hope she modelled that bra on her own...

Coupling

Going to Brook's cabin in New Hampshire once more in two of weeks. Seems this may be turning into a couples weekend with Brook and Jill giving the old relationship another college try and long term shippers Bill and Josey (Bill is a friend of Brook's from his NYU days) joining the crew. If Kramer's new squeeze Eric tags along, baby makes three with Akshay and I the odd ones out.

Am I upset? Nah. Will it be a little awkward? Maybe. Feels a bit like that tv movie Dinner with Friends, where the couple invites their single friends to a weekend by the water in Massachusetts. Hopefully though, Akshay and I won't fall into a loveless marriage and go through an horrendous divorce.

The history of me losing men to other women is ridiculously tragic. So why am I alright with some girls dating my guys and not others? I've just realised, as painfully obvious as this may be, that it is because I like some of these girls and not others. Brook and Jill for instance, despite the fact that this relationship might implode (no offense), I really like them together. This might seem relationship cliche, but Jill makes Brook a better person without losing any of herself.

When...well, a certain Scot, starting dating a girl at St. Andrews, it broke my heart completely but eventually, I got over it because the girl he was dating was so lovely and kind.

I can count two times when this was not the case. One, when Brook was seeing a girl a year ago and I just couldn't stand to be around her because she basically embodied all that I hated, that ambivalence to the world and your part in it. Two, when Crawford started dating Fabiola. I hated that bitch. And though I could mask it with Brook's fling, with Crawford, I was all snide remarks and rolling eyes and wasn't even in love with Crawfy (despite his narcissistic thoughts towards the contrary). It was just that...if these guys weren't with me then they bloody well be with someone better than me, not some stupid bint.